They Walk Among Us

Sometimes you have to sit back and laugh at the madness of humanity. You can put it down to those traffic lights that don’t change or simply another senior moment but to survive you have to laugh. One day it might be you who thinks the last funny President of the United States was Edmund W. Bush.

Edmund W. Bush 1

Edmund W. Bush 2

Edmund W. Bush 3  

The Fridge

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale R50." The next day someone stole it.
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Dead Bird

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted… "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said…"where???"
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Rise of the Sun

While looking at a house, my brother asked the estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don’t keep up with that stuff."   
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Sunburn on the Run

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard
one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on
her weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn’t
think she’d get sunburned because the car was moving".  
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Big Steaks

I told the girl at the steakhouse register that I wanted the half kilogram sirloin. She informed me they only had an 500g sirloin. Not wanting to make a scene, I told her I would take the 500g steak instead of the half-kgr.
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Lifesaver!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it’s designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped She keeps it in the boot…  
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Special Discount

My friends and I were on a Lager run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount….
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Swing that Ring

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn’t the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I had to explain that a person’s nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned…*
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

Lost Luggage

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "Has your plane arrived yet?"…
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

How big is that Pizza

While working at a pizza parlour I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.
CAUTION… They Walk Among Us!

And sadly, not only do they walk among us, they also reproduce!!!!*

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